Milestones

Still Standing...

"You shouldn't ask questions you really don't want the answers to..."


Today is my Pearl Harbor, 9/11, day that will live in infamy etc... However I must take the time to reflect on the past 3 years of my life. When I think of the person I was 3 years ago on this day I shudder. I can't believe how much I've changed.  I believe this change was for the better. I used to be so constrained, so confused. I was in bondage and didn't know it. I was being played for the fool and didn't know it. I've affectionately described this as being in the Matrix.  However I decided on this day to take the red pill  instead of the blue one.  And after making that choice, my life fundamentally changed.

Oftentimes we have these choices to make. I call them Life Changing Events (LCEs). Once you have a LCE you have two choices. You can let it defeat you and keep you down, or you can let it galvanize you and propel you to make the hard choices that put you out of your comfort zone.  My advice is simple. Don't harp on the bad things.  Allow yourself time to grieve, heal and to recover.  Things happen for a reason. Everything has purpose and meaning.  Allow yourself to go with the flow.

Sometimes we try to hold on to those things that aren't worth the trouble.   We fall into a rut and  would rather deal with less than we deserve just because of fear. Fear of the unknown, fear of being alone and fear of what others think. Don't allow yourself to fall victim to fear.  One thing I've learned is that once you face your greatest fear, you have nothing left to fear. You will feel so empowered and nothing will scare you again.

When you are able to tap into that inner strength and use it you will surprise yourself. You will be amazed at how much simpler everything becomes. Things just work out and you will be all the better for it. Remember when one door closes another one opens. We do not have to just accept the things that happen to us. We all have reason and purpose for being here. When you realize this you will be so much happier.  Remember..

We don't always change the world sometimes it changes us. And oftentimes the changes are for the better. We just have to be open and willing to accept the changes. However, most times change isn't easy...

I'm done... I'm never going to revisit this day again as a tragic event. From now on I'll view it as an emancipation. Better yet a new beginning. This process has been my trial by fire... This day shall forever be remembered as the day the old me died and the new me rose from the ashes anew.

My future has never been brighter, my will is stronger than ever, and the past is and shall remain just that...THE PAST. I'm good with the person I've become. So I'll say it again. I'm done with the dreadful memories this day represents.  Enjoy life, love those who are close to you. Don't waste time on those who do not. Step out on faith and take a chance once in awhile.

I'm so over it. Maybe next year I'll throw a party to celebrate...

Long Term Sub

The Surrogate

“I’m no hero… never was…never will be…” –Solid Snake MS4

What becomes of a man

Who get stripped of his role?

Didn’t know I was a stand in

I wasn’t even told…

It was all a lie…

An evil plot it seemed

The worst type of deception

A long nightmarish dream

I was sold snake oil

Setup to be something I was not

Was told it would all work out

Such a fiendish plot

It was carefully designed

Such an uncomplicated plan

The tricky part was finding

A very ignorant man

So then I was profiled

It was so easy to start

This was only because

I looked perfectly for the part

You see I fit the bill

Was so easy to deceive the world

Would have worked even better

If she had borne a girl

But DNA didn’t pass

And a female child didn’t materialize

Could have been validation

But that wasn’t the surprise…

You never wanted the first one

You just needed a pawn

Someone to stand guard for you

While you danced til dawn

And I did just that

A perfect patsy for awhile

But look at me now

Freedom makes me smile

Thought it was permanent but

Was only a long term sub…

Who lost many youthful years of life,

And therein lies the Rub…

Copyright © GL21 6/16/2013